Ep 19. My Husband's Not Gay

In season 1 episode 19 of TLC Presents, viewers are introduced to a controversial topic that caused quite a stir upon release. 'My Husband's Not Gay' is an episode that features four Mormon men who have the unique or unusual desire to live a heterosexual lifestyle; however, they claim that they are attracted to men. The men refer to themselves as "SSA" or "same-sex attracted," not gay, and believe that they are not violating their faith by continuing to live with their wives.

The episode begins by showing the men living their day-to-day lives, going about their business, spending time with their families and friends. The men express their beliefs and share their feelings on how they have always known they were attracted to men, but they do not see themselves as homosexual.

As the episode progresses, viewers are introduced to the wives and their experiences living with men who are attracted to other men but choose to continue living a heterosexual lifestyle. One wife even describes finding out about her husband's attraction to men after she was already married to him, and how she stayed with him, hoping that he would change his mind.

The men explore why they want to have straight, traditional marriages instead of living openly as gay men. They share their reasons for wanting to live a traditional life, such as fulfilling family expectations or a sense of closeness. On several occasions, they talk about how they are happy to have wives who understand their attraction to men and how having a wife has not changed their feelings.

Viewers are also able to watch as the men attempt to date women and follow through with traditional courtship rituals such as asking the father for permission and even proposing. Some of the men are more successful than the others, and viewers can see how dating women is a unique experience for them.

Throughout the episode, viewers are exposed to the opinions of the individuals involved in the men's lives, who express a range of viewpoints, including those of the wives, family members and friends. Additionally, a group of gay men who promote the idea of living an openly gay lifestyle is shown having a discussion on why society tends to stigmatize people who have non-traditional lifestyles.

The episode concludes with the men reflecting on their journey so far and their current thoughts on what the future holds for them. Some of the men are hopeful that they can continue living with their wives, while others are less optimistic. Ultimately, viewers are left with the sense that everyone involved in the episode ultimately wants what is best for themselves and their loved ones.

In summary, season 1 episode 19 of TLC Presents is a thought-provoking episode that explores the lives of four men who feel attracted to other men but desire a typical family-focused, heterosexual lifestyle. Viewers are offered a rare glimpse into the personal lives of the men and the impact their lifestyle choices have on their loved ones. The episode highlights the complex and challenging issues that come with balancing personal desires with societal expectations and the ways in which this can affect the people around them.