'The X Factor' Results Find Out Who Made the Top 7! Recap

No time wasted in getting Kelly Clarkson out on stage tonight. What gives, Steve? You don't have a clip package for us about how the contestants all want this so badly, and how $5 million would change their lives? I'm sure the traditional poorly-disguised product placement segment is coming later.

For now, Kelly is here to sing her new single "What Doesn't Kill You (Stronger)," which starts out all nice and understated with a neat little black and white animation on the screen behind her. And then BAM! COLORS EVERYWHERE! This is exactly the kind of stuff that gave kids seizures when they watched Pokemon.

Ah, here's the clip package: a little recap from last night recounts the action, from the strong (Rachel Crow) to the strange (Melanie's surprise accent).

Back from break, we're treated to the Pepsi Choice Performance, because apparently we don't hear enough from Pepsi. Here's the deal: apparently we were all supposed to go vote on the different elements of the upcoming performance from the Top 9, and the elements with the most votes would all be thrown together in one performance.

That has resulted in a performance with a rotating turntable stage, a circus theme for the costumes, hip hop style dancing, and a laser show. Good job, America. These four elements could not have been any less incongruent to each other if someone went in and chose them specifically. Steve, bless his heart, is honest enough to say, "This is gonna be insane!"

Apparently the song that the viewing audience chose is a Pink mash-up, which the production then had to insert some rap into for Chris and Astro. I'm not sure if any of this is actually happening right now.

The upside of all of this is that the first set of results will occur with all of the contestants in their ridiculous circus costumes. Lakoda Rayne and Drew are called up to center stage, where Steve informs them that one of them will be going through to next week, and the other will be going home RIGHT NOW. Gee, I wonder which one it could be? For the sake of drama, people, you should have called LeRoy or even Astro up there instead. Then again, maybe LeRoy and Astro will be singing for survival at the end.

So the girls of Lakoda Rayne stand there in their burlesque outfits while Drew stands there in her tiny hat, Drew pretending to be worried and Lakoda Rayne already knowing their fate. Sure enough, Steve turns to the Lakoda girls and sends them home, but only after drawing it out wayyyyyy too long. There was no suspense here, Steve.

Back from break, Howie Mandel is here to plug his flash mob show with exactly the kind of enthusiasm that you would expect from Howie Mandel, plugging a flash mob show. That leads us into Bruno Mars' performance of "It Will Rain," which is featured on the "Breaking Dawn" soundtrack.

I gotta hand it to the stage programmers on this one: the lighting and the stuff on the screens is all very cool, at least until it gets all strobe-tastic toward the end. Bruno ends his performance with a humble "thank you," to which Steve sends back an overly enthusiastic "No Bruno Mars, thank YOU!" Sometimes it's hard to tell if this guy is actually enjoying his job, or if he totally hates it.

The rest of the results come in, andit looks like everyone except Rachel has had a chance to change their clothes. Lucky for her, she's quick to be sent through, right after Chris. Those two are followed by Josh, a commercial break, Melanie, and Astro, who reacts by nearly flying off the stage. It's good to see that he didn't end up in the bottom two again, the kid doesn't deserve it. He writes a song's worth of lyrics every single week. Nobody else here does that, except maybe Chris.

So, that leaves Marcus and LeRoy to sing for survival, and I think it's pretty clear how this is going to go. Paula's the wild card here, but you can pretty much guarantee that Simon and LA are voting LeRoy out of here.

Marcus is up first, and it looks like he'll be going the slow ballad route instead of the uptempo route, which, if I had to guess, is why he's in the bottom two in the first place. I know the judges just loved his connection last week, but this guy is best when he's being energetic and dancing around. His vocals are good, but just not interesting enough to sustain him through a slow song.

LeRoy comes out singing "Don't Let Me Down," not a bad song choice for the context. He sings it well, but not in a way that will sway the opinion of Simon or LA. We'll see if he wins Paula over with this one. She has lost all of her contestants at this point. She's a woman with nothing, people! She's a loose cannon!

LA starts off the comments and pretends to actually debate the matter, before stumping for Marcus to the other judges. Nicole, of course, sends Marcus home. Paula, bless her, actually goes with the person she thought sang the best just now, and sends Marcus home as well. Simon wants to "let the public decide" and sends LeRoy home... that means it's a deadlock, and the singer of the lowest votes will be going home.

That singer is LeRoy Bell, which isn't too surprising. LeRoy gives a short and humble speech before Nicole pulls a Nicole and grabs the mic and yells "AND HE'S AMAZING!"

So, with the unceremonious dumping of Lakoda Rayne and the tough elimination of LeRoy Bell, that leaves the top 7 as follows: Marcus Canty, Chris Rene, Astro, Melanie Amaro, Drew, Rachel Crow, and Josh Krajcik. In other words, all the boys, all the girls, and Josh. We're one step away from basically having "American Idol" here.