Video: Joss Whedon 'Endorses' Mitt Romney
by Shannon Keirnan
Joss Whedon, King of the Nerds, has released his political endorsement—and it might not be who you were expecting.
In a humorous video, the mind behind “The Cabin in the Woods” reveals that he will be endorsing Mitt Romney for the upcoming presidential election.
“Mitt Romney is a very different candidate. One with the vision and determination to cut through ‘business as usual politics’ and finally put this country back on the path to the zombie apocalypse.”
Oh, see. Now you get it. Mitt Romney supporters, now is when you’ll want to stop reading.
Whedon’s amusing, tongue-in-cheek video discusses the benefits of having a president who will bring about this much-anticipated zombie apocalypse.
“Romney is ready to make the deep rollbacks in healthcare, education, social services, and reproductive rights that will guarantee poverty, unemployment, overpopulation, disease, rioting… all crucial elements in creating a nightmare zombie wasteland,” he quirks, deadpan.
“Money is only so much paper to the undead. The 1% will no longer be the very rich, it’ll be the very fast. Anyone who can run, fight, make explosives out of household objects or especially do parkour of any kind—you’ll want to stick with them. Unless they read Ayn Rand.”
Whedon adds of the candidate, “He’s not afraid to face a ravening, rasping hoard of sub-humans, because that’s how he sees poor people already.”
What’s the helpful conclusion?
“If Mitt takes office, sooner or later, the zombies will come for all of us,” along with a gentle reminder to begin hoarding canned goods now.
To be fair to all voters, I tried to find a funny video in support of Romney, but apparently Romney endorsers must have a different kind of humor or maybe less access to video camera. So, to those applicable, please enjoy.