'Ringer' Season 1, Episode 1 Recap - 'Pilot'

I want to preface this recap by saying that when I first heard about “Ringer” I was super pumped. It’s Sarah Michelle Gellar aka Buffy back on TV. And not only back, but playing twins! That’s twice the normal amount of SMG! It was like the Buffy nerd’s version of a double rainbow.

Which is why I’m pretty bummed to report that I was vastly underwhelmed by the “Ringer” pilot. This doesn’t mean that the show itself won’t turn out to be very good in the long run.

The television landscape is filled with shows that took some time to find their footing. The first season of "Parks and Recreations" was just "The Office"-lite but now it’s one of the sharpest comedies on the air and nominated for Emmys. Will “Ringer” ever be nominated for an Emmy?

Well…no, probably not. But I still have hopes it will turn into a fun identity-stealing ride once the show works out the melodramatic kinks.

What is “Ringer” and what happened in the actual episode you ask? Ok fine, let’s get to the recap in this recap. “Ringer” is a delightful mix of every Lifetime woman-in-danger movie of the week you’ve ever seen.

We’re introduced to Bridget, the “good” twin, who is just getting sober and getting her life back together. Unfortunately, she’s also the only witness for the prosecution of some guy who killed a stripper. This means that in between flirting with her sponsor she also gets to spend some quality time with Richard Alpert and his magnificent guyliner because he’s the FBI agent in charge of protecting her. I’m sure he has a name and we will undoubtedly see more of him but for right now he will be Agent Richard Alpert to me.

For some unknown reason, Bridget chooses to go on the run from the FBI instead of staying in the loving, well-groomed care of Agent Alpert. I don’t really understand this life choice. but this is only one in a series of really unfortunate things our heroine does this episode. She instead meets up with her high society, Upper East Side sister, Siobhan.

Despite the fact that the entire premise of this show is built around the idea of twins, every scene with the twins uses so much soft lighting, Barbara Walters would think it was excessive. I cannot even talk about the scene where the twins are out together on a boat and the green screen makes everything look fuzzy and SMG look nearly albino.

It's this boat ride that sets the story in motion. Bridget wakes up to find her sister gone, having apparently committed suicide. She then explains to her sponsor but also directly to the audience in case they haven’t been paying attention, that she will be taking over Siobhan’s life to hide out until it’s safe.

And of course Siobhan’s life has all kinds of tricky obstacles. First there’s the husband that looks at her suspiciously when she congratulates him on a business deal. Seems like Siobhan and Mr. Buffy do not get along that well. Then there’s her best friend Gemma who is convinced that her husband Henry is cheating on her. Of course Henry is cheating on Gemma…with Siobhan. Dun-dun-DUN!

There’s also her step-daughter, recently thrown out of boarding school for coke possession, not a great thing to have around a recovering addict. As it turns out, Siobhan is also four months pregnant! This last revelation causes Bridget to say “Siobhan, what did you do?!” in the most melodramatic way possible.

Of course Bridget’s plan to not get murdered is not going much better than her ability to figure out Siobhan’s life. Called to her new apartment in the process of being renovated by best bud Gemma, she’s nearly killed and only saves herself at the last minute with the gun she stole off an FBI agent earlier in the episode. Chekov would be so proud. She then finds out the shocking truth: the killer wasn’t after her, he was after Siobhan. Dun-dun-DUN!

This takes us to the last reveal of the episode which is that Siobhan is still alive in Paris, caressing windows and plotting from afar. What is she up to? Why did she and Bridget have a falling out? Who is trying to kill her? Hopefully some of these mysteries start taking on more of an interest in upcoming episodes.

So what did you think of "Ringer"? Fun, cheesy or both? Will you be tuning in again next week to see Sarah Michelle Gellar and Sarah Michelle Gellar try to kill each other? Sounds off in the comments!