Memo To Bentley Williams: Do NOT Screw With 'The Bachelorette!' Larry David Will Cut You!

We don’t really know if this season’s “Bachelorette” Ashley Hebert is a big “Seinfeld” or “Curb Your Enthusiasm” – though Jesus Fish, why wouldn’t you be? – but we get the feeling she’s probably ordered every season available of both shows on DVD within the last day or so.

Hebert popped up on “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” to talk about this season’s biggest development, the con played out over the course of several weeks by foul-mouthed cretin Bentley Williams.

He played the part of sugar-sweet husband material whenever in her presence, but let fly with the diarrhea of the mouth every time the “confessional” camera’s red light lit up. Finally, after four weeks, Williams threw in the towel and gave Hebert an open-ended kiss-off that later even had host Chris Harrison sharpening his pitchfork.

Say what you will, but my personal favorites will always be “I’d rather be swimming in pee than try to plan a wedding with her,” and of course anything having to do with Hebert “tickling his pickle.”

In any case, “Curb Your Enthusiasm” and “Seinfeld” co-creator Larry David was also a guest and, well . . . Good Lord, Bentley, you need to start being afraid of bald Jewish men with great Hollywood connections. You know you have screwed up something royal when Larry David says of you, “I’m going to kill that mofo.”

Just watch. Words don’t do anything this awesome justice.