Lindsay Lohan Causing Problems For 'Scary Movie 5?'

For that last person out there who really, truly thought that Lindsay Lohan could change (she just needed the opportunity), I am sad to be the one to disappoint.

"Lindsay missed every meeting she had for the film, including script reads and wardrobe meetings. Then she missed her flight to Atlanta on Sunday to shoot the movie. The producers had been getting signs Friday that she was a mess, and would not be fit to work,” says an insider.

Lohan is apparently claiming she is suffering from “walking pneumonia,” which sounds to me kind of like that suspicious cough carried by Patient X right before he started chomping on his doctors.

However, producers of “Scary Movie” have locked the troubled star down with a contract, so to get out of trouble, “she had to prove she was sick. She tried to prove she has walking pneumonia."

Reps for Lohan are saying, “These stories are untrue, and she is willingly fulfilling all of her obligations.”

While I normally would take a celebrity’s rep’s word for it, this is Lindsay Lohan here. Expert cat burglar. Lady of the night. Not exactly known for her professionalism and class, but more known for lacking those key traits and then claiming to be a victim.

In Lohan’s defense, she was lately shooting scenes wherein she had to make fun of herself in front of everyone, as well as kiss Charlie Sheen. Two of my worst nightmares. I'd probably claim some kind of jumping scarlet fever as well.

The scene “went pretty hard at Lindsay,” apparently, and “she was freaking out about it for weeks.”

Sold! Well done, Hollywood plant for “Scary Movie.” You just ensured that I will watch your film. Lindsay Lohan is begrudgingly forced to poke fun at her own hilarious ways, as well as tortured into macking on Sheen—lips I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy?

Yup, I’d watch that.