Kris Humphries Serves Kanye West The Greatest Subpoena Ever

"Know thy enemy...."

-Sun Tzu, The Art of War

All's fair in love, too. Remember that.

Kris Humphries, folks - smarter than the average baller, as Perez Hilton's report suggests. He's at least tremendously more resourceful, and with a smirking sense of humor, to boot.

Rumors surfaced this past June that the former Brooklyn Nets forward and ex-Mr. Kim Kardashian would likely subpoena of Kim's once and present loves to prove the pair's short-lived marriage fraudulent in a court of law. He made good Tuesday on one target, hitting Kim and current boyfriend Kanye West squarely in each individual's weakness for upscale retail.

Humphries' attorney had a very special Nordstrom's box delivered generously right to Kim's doorstep with a spectacular gift-with-purchase freebie: a subpoena for West. Know thy "Perfect B***h."

Humphries' representation is reportedly hoping that Kim's past and present relationships might provide some anecdotal support that the most notorious of Kardashians gives not a single good damn about any benefit from a relationship - including their 72-day marriage - except ever-increasing visibility hanging off just the perfect arm.

Meanwhile, Humphries has already reportedly also subpoenaed Kris Jenner, Kim's mother, as well as "Keeping Up with The Kardashians" producers NBC Universal and Bunim/Murray.

Kim's attorneys previously subpoenaed Myla Sinanaj, the woman Humphries fell for shortly after the pair's express-lane marriage collapsed, to investigate Humphries' claims to her about their failed relationship, including that Jenner orchestrated Kim's amateur-filmed sexy-times romp with Ray J.

"Stupid, stupid people..."

-Jeremy Renner