Episode Jersey Shore Season 3, Episode 10 - 'A Cheesy Situation' Recap
by Andy Neuenschwander
This week's episode picks up where last week left off: Sammi's back, and Ronnie is in a serious mood. The housemates can't believe it…Ronnie thought Pauly was joking when he said "Hi Sam," and Vinny, ever the philosopher, asks an existential question: "Am I dreaming? Or am I awake?"
The girls, meanwhile, are thrilled to have Sammi back. Deena coins the word "hystatic," which is (in her own words) "you know, when you're like, super happy and…really happy."
Sitch has the solution for Ronnie: "We just go out and do what we normally do." And by that he means get paid to get drunk on television.
Sammi commits the cardinal sin of saying that Ronnie looks pale, to which Ronnie responds that he feels like he just saw a ghost. Cue awkward laughter.
Pauly and Mike are unaffected by the return, and Sitch provides a bit of Sammi dialogue. He should have his own one-man show on Broadway.
Important Snooki news: she named Vinny's penis "Moby Dick." I didn't know she was a fan of 19th-century Transcedentalist literature.
The single ladies are living it up at Karma, but Ronnie isn't have a great time. Still, he seems determined to follow Sammi around all night, even as she keeps taking jabs at him.
The relationship that Sammi seems more interested in, though, is the one between Snooki and Vinny: Snicks is starting to "get feelings," but Vinny is off bringing home a nice Dominican girl.
When Snooki, completely unawares, comes back and finds him in bed with the girl, Ronnie makes a quick and forceful intervention. How far do you think Ronnie could throw Snooki? I bet he could shot-put her at least 40 yards.
Nice "done" song, Ronnie.
A little PU (Public Urination) from JWoww. Classy. That's a good reason not to wear open-toed shoes, Deena.
Drama time as Snooki is in tears over Vinny.
Deena is officially the worst driver in the Tri-State area. This could be the last episode of Jersey Shore. This trip to the bowling alley could kill them.
Glad we went through all those Snooki tears, as now she's totally calm about Vinny.
But hey, let's talk about what's important: the clogged toilet. If there's a villain in the saga that is Jersey Shore, it's this thing. You get the feeling that there's a showdown coming between the crew and the toilet, and only one will come out alive.
The plumbers come by the next day, and Snooki has a little crush on "the fat one." The source of the clog is revealed: a wife beater supposedly belonging to Vinny. There's a mystery to be solved. The game is afoot.
Snooki takes it upon herself to clean the bathroom, and uses dish soap for the toilet bowl. That girl needs help.
Snicks, Sammi and Ronnie decide to hang out sober for the night. Whaaaaaaat? But that doesn't mean they're going to behave: to get Mike back for the cab prank, Team Sober puts some parmesan cheese and cream cheese between his mattresses. The plan works perfectly, as Stich brings a girl home to the "cheese bed" but things that the smell is coming from her. What is it with this episode and odors?
In other news, Mike doesn't know how STDs work.
This week's take-home lessons: yeast infections can smell like grated cheese, you should always wear closed-toe shoes when peeing in public, and don't flush shirts down the toilet.