'Dancing With The Stars' Season 13, Episode 12 Recap - 'Broadway Week Performances'

Hello, and welcome to Week Six of the 13^th “Dancing with the Stars.” This week, the CBS Television City ballroom went Broadway and the remaining seven couples pulled double-duty with two dances apiece to decide who stays alive and keeps chasing the Mirrorball Trophy.

Last week, fans showed that the margin for error has just about expired, with former Bravo fashion guru Carson Kressley finally hitting a week where skating by on charisma alone just couldn’t carry him any further.

Meanwhile, soap star and Iraq veteran J.R. Martinez overtook Ricki Lake and took back his and Karina Smirnoff’s place atop the Leader Board after a week that saw Lake struggle just a bit.

It should be noted that, this being Broadway Week, each star danced not alone but side-by-side with one another during a combined number that let fans compare each star’s movies against his or her fellow contestants.

The ever-improving Rob Kardashian and pro Cheryl Burke have more than made good on Kardashian’s preseason smack-talk about outlasting the three weeks his sister Kim lasted. This week, he and Burke worked out a cha-cha to “Walk Like A Man.”

“It’s going to be a tough battle, and I’m hoping I can knock J.R. off that top spot,” Kardashian said, after a Week Six rumba to Lionel Richie that earned him a season-high 25 and second place on the Leader Board.

“You’ve kind of turned from a boy into a man,” said Rob’s mom, Kris Jenner, when she dropped in on rehearsal. I’m no big Kardashian family fan, but that’s got to sound a little backhanded to Rob, who’s been the Kardashian that’s often kept himself out of the limelight. “You used to be this shy boy who thought he could never do something like this in a million years.”

Weren’t the rumors that she strong-armed Rob into doing the show?

Either way, Kardashian’s moves lacked the “pop” that J.R.’s often have and his timing was a bit off for a few early moves, but he nevertheless looked once more like he’s having fun and was ready to take over.

“Each dance gives you challenges,” Len remarked. “The cha-cha has to show rhythm, and there was no rhythm. It was all stiff.”

“Opening Night, Broadway, you’ve got to take it full-on,” said Bruno. “It was adequate, but it didn’t have the impact and power it should have at this stage.” Carrie Ann threw in that he was “right on the cusp” of being where he wants to be. All in all? Good enough for a 22.

Next up, it was Nancy Grace and Tristan MacManus dancing a foxtrot to “Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life” from “Monty Python’s Spamalot.” Grace has sometimes lacked a little confidence and has been stubborn enough that she’s sometimes tested her partner’s patience.

“I know what you’re doing,” Grace at point told MacManus during rehearsals. “I asked for more dramatic and difficult choreography, and you’re trying to pack so much dramatic and difficult stuff in that I’m going to f*** it up. “

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” MacManus told her point-blank.

Grace looked like pushing herself did her good as she danced with the most glee she has throughout the entire season and didn’t look like she missed a step.

“You upped the ante on the content, and you nailed it. I would call that a show-stopper,” Carrie Ann said.

Len had good news and bad news.

“Much more personality came out. We saw a different side to you,” Len said, before making a few technical tsk-tsk remarks. “Your posture wasn’t there. Your footwork wasn’t there.” Grace is sometimes actually coming across likable and the pair came up with a 24 this week.

Near the middle of the lineup, David Arquette and Kym Johnson danced a quick step before the group number worked on by who host Tom Bergeron introduced between individual numbers as “creative director” . . . . Carson Kressley?

Um . . . . huh?

“Those who can’t dance, teach!” he proudly said.

Anyway . . .

The pair danced a Week Five tango to Soft Cell’s “Tainted Love” that tied them with Kardashian and Burke for second place, and this week, it was a quick step to “We Go Together” from “Grease.”

“I like the quick step because it’s a fun dance. It’s very joyful, and it’s similar to my energy,” Arquette said. As Johnson followed up and noted, Arquette was challenged to keep his energy enough under control that it doesn’t overwhelm his technique – especially since, as he pointed out, it’s the same dance Martinez and Lake are respectively dancing. Come dance time, Arquette had surprisingly ditched his Deputy Dewey mustache from “Scream” and looked not just clean cut, but like he was having the time of his life while continuing to show off drastically improved technique.

The man comes a long way each week showing a humble work ethic.

“As far as performance goes, you guys lived up to every expectation we could’ve had,” Carrie Ann said. “But you guys seemed a little out of synch.”

“The energy was right there, and you got everybody going,” Bruno added, while also chiding like his colleagues that the pair looked a little off. Still, it was good enough for jazz, so to speak – and a 23.

Let the Lead Board duel continue: next it was time for Lake and partner Derek Hough to see if they couldn’t reclaim their Leader Board lead with a number from “Guys and Dolls.”

Lake, who got her big break in the ‘80s dance hit “Hairspray” by John Waters, was right in her element – on paper.

“This quick step is going to be really challenging because I’m running the entire time, and I just hope I can keep up with Derek,” Lake said. Even for as frustrated as Lake got, Hough kept driving her.

“I’ve noticed that when I’m really tough on Ricki, she tends to do better,” Hough said.

“I think I’m under some big-time pressure because J.R.’s also doing the quick step this week. He’s in better shape than me, he’s a better dancer than me,” Lake said. “J.R., I’m coming for ya!”

“Luck Be A Lady” proved to be a show-stopper, and I’m seeing a pattern with Lake: she lets the frustration and nerves flow during rehearsal, so that be the time it’s time to really dance, she’s light as air. It’s a smart, smart approach.

Their dance even earned a standing ovation from Carrie Ann and Bruno.

Len?

“You don’t need luck if you’ve got talent, and that number proved you’ve got it,” Len said. “I loved it. I thought it was fantastic.”

“Impeccable style. Outstanding choreography,” Bruno said. “Your interpretation of the music was beyond belief.”

“It was everything a number should be,” Carrie Ann said. It was J.R.’s turn to start sweating, because the pair notched a 29 with 10s from Bruno and Carrie Ann  and a 9 from Len.

The poor pair that had to follow that act? Chaz Bono and Lacey Schwimmer, dancing a “Phantom Of The Opera” tango. Rehearsals started showing some cracks in the pair’s armor of likability that’s carried them most of the way.

“I can’t help you memorize your dance. I just can’t,” Schwimmer at one point told her partner during rehearsal. Keep in mind, this couple has already been told once this season that their dance resembled “an Ewok dancing with Princess Leia.”

Then finally, Schwimmer said it.

“At this stage in the game, I can’t make something super-basic, which is what we’ve been doing,” she very bluntly told Bono. “You’ve been filling it up with your personality and that’s great, but the problem is with the tango, we’re in a hold the entire time.”

“What I want to do every week is show that I’m improving and doing my best,” Bono said. “You cannot rely on me to get you through this anymore.”

Well . . . she tried?

Schwimmer, once more, danced a fine dance and Bono happened to be there. Maybe having him dance wearing the “Phantom” mask was a bad idea, because it took Bono’s personality right out of the equation. Nothing else really looked inspired and on a night when all eyes were on Lake, Kardashian, Arquette and Martinez, he picked a fine night to look unremarkable. To make a “Phantom” comparison, Bono was Monday night’s Gerard Butler.

“It was like watching a cute little penguin trying to be a big, menacing bird of prey,” Bruno said. “Some roles fit certain characters, and some roles don’t.”

“I tend to agree with Bruno a little bit, but each person has their own journey on this show,” Carrie Ann tacked on. “This was the most aggressive I’ve seen you. But in Week Six, we need more content.”

And Len?

“The first rule of the contest is to get through your routine, and you did that,” he said. “However, for the tango, the hold should be tighter. There should be more aggression.” Once more, it’s back beneath the 20s with a 19 and a return to the bottom of the Leader Board. Are the mercy votes used up? Tuesday will tell.

“They’ve survived low scores before with the help of your votes,” Brooke Burke told us after the scores.

Right you are, Brooke. Unfortunately, it’s now impossible to ignore that Bono just isn’t much of a dancer.

Quite honestly, if any one couple could save Bono from elimination, it’s probably Hope Solo and Maksim Chmerkovskiy. If this week wasn’t the one that lit a fire under Solo’s tight and toned ass, it would probably be her last week dancing. She’s faced critique after critique claiming that she needed more rehearsal time. Was the week that the World Cup goalie finally put the last pieces together?

“I keep trying and trying, and nothing’s ever good enough,” Solo said through tears backstage last week. To her credit, this is the same woman who once publicly ripped into a U.S. soccer coach who benched her for a pivotal World Cup game that the U.S. team ultimately lost.

“I don’t like staying in one spot. For me, that’s a failure if you don’t improve,” Solo said. To that end, Maks brought in three dancers from the show’s professional troupe to help bring out the grace and sex appeal in their rumba that the judges have been trying to coax out of Solo from the season’s start.

But the frustration returned when Solo’s moves once more looked awkward during rehearsals.

“Everybody else has given up to the fact that you might not be a good dancer, potentially. I still believe,” Maks said. Yikes. “You’ve gotta give me something to hold onto, because I’m losing faith, too.”

Still, Solo’s a clutch player. And when it came time to rumba to “Seasons Of Love” from “Rent,” she became womanly, graceful and tender. She just might’ve saved herself, with Bono this week regressing to a lackluster performance. It was a good time to step up.

“I see all the effort you’re putting in toward your movement and movement quality. And for the first time, I saw you relaxing and trusting your natural sexiness,” Carrie Ann began the critiques. “But still, you sometimes forced the move so much.”

“I’m at a loss really,” Len said. “I’ve never lost faith in you. I always feel there is so much there, and for some reason it hasn’t come out. This is your worst dance of the whole season in my opinion.” Len even went so far as to blame Maks.

Incidentally, Maks has apparently had it – and I don’t mean with Solo, either.

“As long as the audience likes our journey, we’re good,” he said, addressing the boos that cascaded down on Len.

“The audience? Let me tell you, Maks, the audience liked the effect. They judge on efficacy. I’ve been in this business for nearly 50 years,” Len retorted.

“Then maybe it’s time you got out,” Maks answered. “That’s disrespectful to everybody. Everybody’s putting in a lot of effort. Everybody on that balcony has been dying and killing themselves only to hear you guys’ little judgmental comments. It’s a little much.”

Well . . . huh. Their 20 will barely keep them off the bottom, but Maks wasn’t even close to done letting the judges have it with both barrels.

“With all due respect, this is my show. I helped make it what it is. I love every aspect of it, I love every professional that’s ever been here and I love every celebrity that puts effort into every week,” Maks said to Burke after receiving the pair’s score. “Having said that, I’m a little tired that we’re being judged some on effort and some on heel leads. That’s all I’m saying.”

Saving arguably the best for last, it was next time for Martinez and Smirnoff to do their thing and see if they couldn’t hold a lead for a second straight week.

“Derek and Ricki are right behind me and they’re chasing me, so I’m motivated to deliver a great quick step,” a fired-up Martinez said.

“I need to prove beyond a doubt that J.R. is not a fluke,” said an equally driven Smirnoff, who called the pair’s quick step the most ambitious routine she’s performed on the show yet.

One of the most challenging things about these recaps has been coming up with new adjectives to describe Martinez. The “Chicago”-inspired number made it apparent that when the show ends, it’ll be a crime against the Great White Way if he doesn’t pursue something onstage. It was an ambitious number, but the continuing leader duel between Martinez and Lake is making for the most compelling performances on the season.

“You are relentless,” Len said.

“Bob Fosse would’ve been proud,” Carrie said.

Damn right, he apparently would’ve been. The pair tied Lake and Hough with the night’s second 29.

Share and share alike, J.R.?

Finally, instead of simply recapping the group number – watch and enjoy.