Charlie Sheen Nearly Sues Strip Club

Charlie Sheen could use image consultation.

He doesn't need it so much strictly because his behavior needs changing. That's another matter entirely. He apparently just needs a good mirror so he can be reminded what actually constitutes his image. Maybe then, he wouldn't, as TMZ alleges he nearly did, file suit against a strip club and claim that having a kinky VIP room named after him harms his image.

Nevertheless....such was Ma-Sheen's threat. The once "Two and a Half Men" and future "Anger Management" star told New York's Cheetahs Club management that he'd drag them before a judge if they didn't yank his name off the exclusive room. Amid the posh surroundings, clientele with more money and libido than modesty may eat strategically placed sushi off the naked bodies of strippers.

Maybe it's just that even Sheen's gut wrenches a little at consuming anything that's made contact with a stripper's skin, but he claimed that being associated with such antics hurt his reputation. There's no telling how much time management really sank into explaining that his "reputation" absolutely warranted the honorary naming, but the club owner asked the New York Post's Page Six, "How could sushi damage Charlie Sheen's reputation?"

Give strippers and the people who manage them credit: business-wise, things always simply are what they are.

In any case, Sheen's name is already gone from the room. But nestled in the billowy and perky hearts of strippers everywhere, and like persistent rashes and itching (and in at least a few cases, probably ill-advised tattoos) elsewhere, the name "Charlie Sheen" will never be completely gone.